Trust me, i was sitting in front of this page for 15 minutes trying to figure out something to write about. don't know why it took so long, but then it clicked me...best thing to write about when u got a moment of inspiration to blog, is whatever you're going through at moment. got just one word for ya in my case....jobless.
it's been 7 months since college officially ended for me. but forget that number for now. a phase of life got over the moment i wrote the last exam in April. and anybody in that position definitely deserves a break. so it's understandable that i spent the month of May doing absolutely nothing. well...not exactly 'nothing'...we did move in to our new place in May, and we used all that time to adjust to the new environment. again...understandable.
Come June, you know that the break cannot be over yet...you had spent 4 years huffing and puffing after all. and what better way to blast your holidays other than a trip to Goa...but sit home and watch the football world cup! the timing just couldn't be better. so i spent the month cheering away for england...but before i could even so much as wave the bloody flag, they got eliminated. ah well...football is football. we all ended up enjoying the one month long tournament anyway....predicting the outcomes, swearing against the brazilians, debating about refereeing decisions, taking part in the million facebook battles....it was all very much fun.
Come July, the world cup is over and we are all exhausted, but still looking for something else new in life to look forward to. and in my case, my folks had come down from uae. ah cmon Mr. Conscience....family comes first right? so there you go, i got something else to do now. no guilt anywhere in my mind yet. spend some quality time with mom, dad and sis. share out the different stories happening in india and in uae. eat mom's food and get well-fed. or rather, get the chevrolet beat in my hands asap and blast off with my mates each time i return to 2k3 with the excuse of attending CAT classes. wohoooo!
August has arrived, and then the mental countdown to my birthday automatically begins. family is still around, so i still got something to do. and then the day comes when i'm finally crowned as an engineer. wohoo again. more reason to keep going in this flow of jobless-ness.
Come September, family returns back to uae. and THEN, the guilt slowly starts creeping in. i suddenly realise...wait a sec, it's been 4 months since college officially ended! and then the fact that i've cleared all my papers brings me no more satisfaction, but only more guilt that i've done absolutely nothing with my life even at this point. i search for more distractions, but i can't find any. there's a limit to how many movie tickets i can purchase. and the damn rabbits have gone to hell. and then, i do the ultimate thing that any man does to make himself feel more like a man and also to get distracted...join the gym :)
September clearly defined the meaning the jobless-ness for me, but i was thankfully deprived from thinking too much about it thanks to my slowly developing biceps and the amount of time i spent on the bed, sleeping away to glory.
October barely starts and bam! i'm bleeding out on the floor thanks to a pop music video, a tv remote control and the obstinacy of 2 idiots fighting over it. few hours later i'm getting a TT shot, local anesthesia and getting plastic surgery done above my right eyebrow. ah cmon, Mr. Conscience...can't you see that i'm injured here??? i need 20 days rest!
So there goes around 20 days without any further guilt or even gym :( but by the time i'm almost fully recovered, the familiar feeling of "what the hell are you doing with your life?" creeps back in. People ask me, " How's your CAT preps going?". and i reply, "huh...what CAT? oh...the thing i spent more than 16000 bucks for? oh yea, that's going fine". or at least that's what the people hear. but inside, my heart had just plummeted down. deep deep down.
Come November, the situation hasn't changed. except now it's indeed been 7 months since college ended. yes, now the statistic is very scary. the only hope i have is the result of a certain interview for a big company that i attended. until that comes out successful(or goes to hell, so that i can do something about CAT or fly off to UAE and rot), i'm still gonna be sitting.....what's that word again....oh yeah.....jobless.
which explains why i have all the time in the world to sit and think about something to blog about, and even more time to write it all down. no tension of meeting deadlines, no hassle of waking up early in the morning, no responsibility of completing projects, no schedules to be made for the next week, no late night cramming...just no fuss and absolutely no brainwork.
"ahhh.....what a life!", some of you might chant. think again.
yours
vysh
No comments:
Post a Comment